Why the World Needs Me…

So check this out:  In that movie, “Superman Returns,” Superman inexplicably up and disappears for a couple years.  A jilted Lois Lane then writes a man-hating newspaper story called “Why the World Doesn’t Need Superman.”  Talk about a woman scorned, huh?

 

The sweet irony of it all is that soon the world – and Lois – painfully realize that they really do need him.  The flick closes with a regretful Lois eating her words by writing a new piece called “Why the World Needs Superman.”  This SO reminds me of me.

 

There’s a bunch of things me and Superman have in common, but the biggest is that, like Superman, the world needs me too.  While I can’t do much about protecting mankind from the evil clutches of Lex Luthor, what I can do is protect you from the frustrations of sex and dating gone bad.  This includes, but is not limited to, casual sex, one-nighters, friends with benefits, booty calls (or texts), and yes, even exclusive relationships if that’s your thing.

 

How?  Good question.  Well for those of you who know me, you’re probably familiar with my Chicago newspaper sex column, “The Sex Playbook.” For 2 ½ years my column pointed out all the idiotic—yet true to life—little things men and women do to each other in the world of sex and dating that causes way more drama than there should be.  So before I came here to my new home at NBC5, I took a short hiatus from writing, and judging by all the emails from my readers all my tips, lessons, and guidance was dearly missed.  Sex and dating in Chicago took a turn for the worst.  Like Superman, the world needed me.

 

For those of you who don’t know me, I’m not a PhD.  I’m not a therapist.  I don’t even like Dr. Phil.  I’m single and have never been married.  I date a lot.  Quite often actually. As the title suggests, I’m a serial dater.  That doesn’t mean I’m a player or a womanizer.  It simply means I’ve had the sex and dating volume required to have enough experience to draw from—both good and bad.  You’ll get to learn from my successes and horror stories…and damn there’s a lot of em.  You’re gonna get to know what I know.  What can I say; I’m a humanitarian.

 

While women will definitely benefit from my insight, my column and blog are geared more toward men.  Being a firefighter we believe deeply in brotherhood so I feel obligated to help my fellow brothers because let’s face it, when it comes to sex men are pretty stupid.  They let Big Willie and the twins do way more of their thinking than they should.  They need all the help they can get because it’s easy to get lost.  They need someone to show them the way.  That’s where I come in.  I’m like a human sexual navigation system.

 

And don’t agree with my man-dissin’ just yet, ladies.  Just because you think more rationally than us and smell better than we do doesn’t mean you have the upper hand.  You’re stupid too—only for different reasons.  What reasons, you ask?  Well keep reading “Sex 9-1-1” each week and find out.  In no time you’ll agree with me when I say that indeed, the world does need me.

 

Find out more about Jon at www.jonibrahim.com and check out his podcast “The Fireman and the Shrink” and all the other great content on the Better Sex website at www.nbc5.com/bettersex.  You can email Jon at sex911@nbc5.com.     

   

  

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2 Responses to Why the World Needs Me…

  1. Shamontiel says:

    Damn, now I see why you don’t like Valentine’s Day. You love yourself so much, who else needs to? 🙂 LOL It’s all good though. Thanks for telling me you switched to NBC. I refused to read the Red Eye, but I’ll read your column here until NBC pisses me off.

  2. Jon says:

    Well of course I love myself! After all, I know myself better than anyone, and I never let myself down! Whatever that means.

    Anyway, I’ll make sure to let NBC not to piss you off!

    NIce to see ya here!

    Jon

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