Recently I was chatting with a female friend about how she’s had a stretch of bad dates lately. After hearing every grisly gut-wrenching detail of the dates she was right; they WERE bad dates. As sorry as I was for her I do always get a perverted thrill in hearing other people’s dating misery. What can I say; I’m easilly entertained.
So my expert opinion for her was that the dates were definitely bad because of the dudes — they were lame-o’s. But imagine her surprise when I then told her that in the end, it was her fault.
And that goes for all of you out there who go on continuous runs of bad dates. Maybe you weren’t the one who made them bad, but it’s definitely your fault. Why? Most likely it’s because of your poor selection skills when it comes to accepting who you’ll date. I got news for you: just because someone asks doesn’t mean you have to go out with them.
Take me for example. Life is WAY too short to go on bad dates. And yes, I’m not shy in proclaiming that I’m too good for bad dates. Conceited, you say? Maybe. But I’ll hazard to guess that if more people were as selective as me they’d have a lot less dating woes.
I’m of the opinion that, at least in my world, 85% of the population is undateable for one reason or another. That leaves the remaining 15% for me to sift through. But since that’s such a low percentage it means you date a lot less–and THAT’S where people get themselves in trouble.
Some people think dating success is determined by volume. They feel confident if their dating calendar is full. They think if they’re not going on dates then they’re a loser. But the reality is that dating is all about quality not quantity. I’ll take sitting on the couch in my underwear watching Family Guy and eating mac and cheese out of the pan over a bad date any day of the week–and feel totally secure in my dating life doing it. That’s why I don’t have many bad date stories. I go for top shelf. I’m a 15% kinda guy.
Granted women complain about bad dates far more than men, not just because women are normally over-critical than they need to be, but because men are so clueless sometimes that they can’t recognize a bad date if it sucker punched them in the face. And besides, men will tolerate much more punishment on a bad date, especially if the chick is hot or there’s potential to get laid.
So come on people; be a little more selective will ya?!? Don’t just date for dating’s sake. Up your standards a bit or accept less questionable dates and maybe your bad date horror stories will diminish. Sure it won’t be as entertaining for me but if it helps you, what the hell.
Find out more about Jon at www.jonibrahim.comand make sure to check out his podcasts “The Fireman & the Shrink and all the other cool sex stuff at NBC’s Better Sex Page at www.nbc5.com/bettersex. You can email Jon at firstname.lastname@example.org